Lessons in Motherhood

And so it has come to this…I am now bribing my child to go peepee on the potty. Is bribe to strong of a word? Maybe it’s more like a strong encouragement bolstered by high doses of sugar. Yeah, let’s go with that for now.
Anyway, this is not my fault. I [...]

On Easter Sunday, we lost Sophia in the house. It was the first time that we lost Sophia but certainly not the last. It was quite crazy. She came into the kitchen, and then turned around and walked out. I never follow her around so I have no idea where she [...]

Duh…of course there was going to be a second episode. You knew that as soon as I uttered the words “we’ll try again tomorrow.”
So, there we were on Friday morning with matching – no, coordinating – polka dot outfits all set for a second try at the sibling pictures. This time [...]

Today was picture day at school. Technically, it was Hailey’s picture day since Sophia’s class was slated for pictures tomorrow. Unfortunately, for my little one, Mommy likes to have sibling pictures. And no, I don’t dress them in matching outfits, but not because I wouldn’t do that. Mostly because I never [...]

Dear Sophia,
What business do you have turning two? You were just my little baby yesterday, and now you are two. Where did the time go?
Now, you are a little person who is full of personality. Your tantrums are epic, your laughter contagious, and your vocabulary ever expanding.
I’m sorry that we [...]

Last night during the tantrum of the century, I found myself compelled to spank my youngest child, but I’m not a spanker. Instead, I decided to talk as quietly and calmly as possible so that I was barely audible over her screaming. Actually, I wasn’t audible at all over her screaming. Somehow, [...]

Can I just hibernate through Sophia’s terrible two’s? Is that possible? I’m sure that you thought that I would want to hibernate through the whole move, but I would take arguing with bankers and packing 4 million boxes over dealing with one Fifi tantrum. Oh Lordy can that girl turn it on! [...]

If you someday read in the Atlanta newspaper that an unknown woman’s head has spontaneously exploded, I want you to know immediately that it was me. My head has exploded because my youngest child is going through what I will mildly call the “screeching” phase. She basically cannot be the slightest bit excited [...]

I don’t even know what to say about my youngest daughter. She just comes up with the strangest ideas that make me say WTF? just about every day. Of course, I don’t say that out loud because that would only solidify my position as the worst mother in the world.
Anyway, [...]

Apparently the chase the laser game works on cats AND Fifi’s…