Lessons in Motherhood

I was just having an interesting conversation with a friend of mine about Reggio versus Montessori versus Standard curriculums for toddlers and preschoolers. Before I had Hailey, I was always a big proponent of Montessori, which gives kids the opportunity to direct their learning in a more unstructured way than the standard “we have story from 10-10:30 then art from 10:30-11:00, etc” type of curriculum. I’m not as familiar with Reggio, but she tells me that it’s even less structured than Montessori. Now, as I said, I was a big proponent of Montessori before I had kids, but when I went to look at a Montessori school again a few months ago, I was shocked by how turned off I was by the sheer chaos of it all. I truly feel that at her age, Hailey needs structure. She needs someone to help direct her to activities and encourage her learning around a few key areas. Of course, I want her to develop critical thinking skills, but I don’t think that being in a more structured preschool is going to translate into her NOT asking me how Santa can fly around to everyone’s house in one 12 hour period (more on the Santa debate at a later date). Now, on the weekends, she often has unstructured time, and she is certainly capable of playing by herself. However, after a certain amount of time, she’s bored and wants some direction. It makes for a much easier day for all of us if I can say, we are going to do 2 activities today and whatever happens in between is free time. Luckily, she’s at the age where I can say…do you want to play games or do you want to color? (more on game playing later too) All of that is to say that I’m still happy with Hailey’s preschool. She seems to be really learning her letters and, more importantly, the sounds that the letters make. Luke swears that she’ll be reading by the fall. I’m not so sure about that, but she’s a smart cookie so I won’t bet against her.

Hailey had her first dentist appointment yesterday. We took her to a special pediatric dentist who was recommended by multiple Mommies, and let me tell you that pediatric dentists are totally different than regular dentists. Everything was kid friendly, and there was singing. Singing I tell you!!! Hailey was an angel through most of it until the dentist whipped out that pointy sharp metal thing (you know what I’m talking about). There’s just no way to make that sharp metal thing look friendly. At that point, all cooperation came to a screeching halt, and there was actual screeching to be heard throughout the building. Luckily, the whole ordeal of the sharp metal pointy thing was mitigated by a princess sticker and a new beaded bracelet. Ah to be a child again and have all your problems so easily solved. The next time you’re in for that root canal, maybe you could take solace in the thought that there might be a princess sticker waiting for you on the other side. Well, that and some good drugs!

Hailey and Sophia (and Mommy) attended their first major league baseball game last Tuesday. Here are a few pics from that.   Not surprisingly, Hailey wanted to eat everything she saw.  She had a hot dog, peanuts, a red icee, and ice cream.  She wanted popcorn too, but that would have probably sent us to the poor house, so I had to draw the line at that point.  Sophia slept for a while during the game, then woke up as soon as people really started screaming.  It was a Yankee-Braves game, so high drama.  Sophia didn’t like the noise too much.  In fact, I ended up taking her into the First Aid room where the wonderful EMT’s let us use a room to breastfeed, gave us a water, and shared their air conditioning.  What a great find!  

Mommy: “Hailey stop itching your mosquito bites.”
Hailey: “I’m not itching them, I’m scratching.”

Mommy: “Uh oh, Hailey, you got a little sunburned today at school.”
Hailey: “Marley did it.”

Hailey (reverse logic): “The parking lot is dangerous because you need to carry me.”

Grandpa: “Oh, that freaking cat.”
Hailey: “Oh, that freaking cat”
(Thanks for that one Grandpa)

Hailey: “I have 2 boys – Corbin, Kellen, and Mr Potato Head”

Hailey: “Acceptable means that we have to get in the pool.”

Sleep deprivation over a long period of time has very funny effects on the human body. Most of the time, I feel completely normal. Then, there are times when my judgment is well, let’s just say, impaired. Let me give you three amusing examples that have occurred over the last week or so.

1) I leave the grocery store with my basket full of groceries only to realize that I’ve driven my cart to the parking spot that I wanted to get before someone rudely cut in front of my car and stole the spot from me. So, now I’m wandering the parking lot with a cart full of groceries because I don’t remember where I actually parked, only where I wanted to park.

2) I get home from the grocery store and realize that the one pound of sliced turkey I ordered from the deli is missing. I recall going to the deli counter and taking the package of turkey from the woman, but now it’s not in any of the bags, in the car, in the garage, not anywhere. I check the receipt, and I was not charged for the turkey. Instead of jumping to the most logical conclusion, “oh I left it in the basket before I checked out or it fell out of the basket,” my first reaction is that I actually dreamed up the entire thing. I never went to the deli counter. Yup, I dreamed it in the few hours of sleep I got the night before. What?

3) This is the best one…At our farmer’s market, you have to check your own grocery bags at the front desk. I have a bunch of Trader Joe’s bags that I stick inside an insulated grocery bag. You hand them the bags at customer service, and they give you a number. When you check out, you hand them the card with the number and they retrieve your bags. Well, I retrieved my bags, but when I opened the insulated bag, the bags that I stuck inside were blue. Well, my bags are red or at least I remembered them being red. Instead of thinking that they handed me the wrong bags (the most likely scenario), I actually think that maybe I’ve crossed into an alternate universe in which I purchased blue bags, not red bags. I pretty much refused to go complain that I had received the wrong bags because I honestly believed that the alternate universe explanation was the most logical one. Eventually, my mother insisted that I go back and see if they handed me the wrong bags…which, of course, was the case. Whoa!

I am a firm believer in mother’s instinct. Whenever another mother says to me “I think it might be time to…” (insert: change daycares, introduce formula, start solid foods, let the baby cry it out, etc), I always say “well, if you think it’s time to do that, then it probably is, and don’t let anyone tell you differently.” I just think that mothers tend to know their children the best and have a sense for when these life-altering changes are needed. Think of it as Mommy-Spidey Sense. Does anyone else get that reference?

All of that is to say that my Mommy Sense is a-tinglin’. After a rough night in which Sophia woke me up every two hours to comfort nurse, I’m beginning to think that it might be time to cut the cord a bit here. I love having her in my bed for the convenience of nursing at night, but she’s a thrasher – kicking her legs, punching herself or me in the face, grunting, etc. It makes me exhausted just thinking of how often she wakes herself (and me) up. The question is, if I take her out of the bed, will she be able to soothe herself back to sleep without the boob? Once she’s out, I’m not going to be hopping out of bed to comfort her unless she’s in full meltdown mode. Since the girls are sharing a room, I can’t really chance her waking Hailey up if it comes to that. So, the only alternative is to put her in some type of contraption in our bedroom, like a pack n’ play, to test out the new sleeping arrangement first. I could also put her in her crib in Hailey’s room (excuse me – their room), hook up a monitor and hope for the best. Whatever we decide, something must be done because I think she’s ready to make it through the night (or close to it). We just need to remove the Mommy crutch, or boob as the case may be.

When I was breastfeeding Hailey, I worked in a nice quiet office with a door and a lock. Every time I had to pump, I just closed the door, pulled the shades, and stuck those little suckers on. I could email; I could read; I could write a thesis (yes, I’m a multi-tasker). Now, I work in a big cube farm which is not at all conducive to pumping. Luckily, my wise employer has provided 2 “mother’s rooms” for exactly this purpose. One room is on my floor and the other is 2 floors up. Wouldn’t you know it, but the room on my floor is nasty with a toilet in it, not exactly sanitary conditions. The other room is a bit more comfortable, but about a mile away from where I sit. So, everyday, no matter how badly my feet are throbbing from my new, cute work shoes, I have to stop what I’m doing and march myself up there, lugging my big mama double-pump bag. Did I mention that I have to do this three times a day? Then, I have to walk my throbbing little feet back to my break room to quietly slip the little milk cooler (which says Medela all over it…not much on subtlety) into the fridge. At that point, I can return to my desk, put my big-mama-jo pump bag away and resume normal operations. This is what some might call a big pain in my ass.

Oh, and as if this whole little process was not difficult enough, there can be complications. For example, today I finished pumping only to realize that I didn’t have a lid for the milk bottle or a bag to put the milk in to carry it downstairs. How was I going to transport this liquid gold in an unopened bottle all the way down the elevator, through the quads without spilling it? Well, there was no other option than to carry the opened bottle in my hand. Now, I’m walking through the halls with an open container of breastmilk. “Hey, Alisa, what’s that you’ve got there?” “Oh just some breastmilk, Dr. So and So. Want a sip?” Note: That didn’t really happen, but the thought of it was mortifying. Of course, I can’t take the milk home now because I don’t want to carry it all the way out of the building so it has to sleep in the fridge overnight. Moooo!

We had to complete our first school project for Monday. It was a little scary because I didn’t quite get all of the instructions, so I kind of just guessed as to what we were supposed to do. I’ll get a little bit better about following directions when the homework is actually graded. I think we’re ok on this one. Anyway, I just wanted to share Hailey’s little family poster board project. She did all of the placement of the photos and letters. Plus, there’s some additional Hailey “writing” around the pictures.